Abubuwan dasuke bata sabon aure a kasar Hausa

Yankinmu na arewa ko kuma ace yankin hausa/Fulani ya kasance inda yafi koina mutuwar aure. A cikin al’ummar hausa/Fulani zakaga aure bashida martaba da kima sosai a idon wasu sabida yanda suke yanda sukaga dama dashi a duk lokacin dasuke so. Munsamu kanmu a wani lokaci da akanyi aure auren yamutu a cikin wata 3, Maza basu dauki saki wani babban abu ba sukanyi shi akan dalilin da bai kai ya kawo ba.

Wanan matsala takasance ta dami al’ummar mu. Saki abu ne wanda yake halal a musulunci amma dukda halarcinsa yakasance abu wanda Allah da Manzonsa basa sonshi. Illar saki yawuce kawai rabuwar ma’auratan, yana naso ne har izuwa dangi da sauran yan’uwan su.

Wanan matsala yawancinta ba a ciki gida ake samunta ba, ana samota ne tin daga waje kafin ayi aure. Sannan kuma akwai abubuwa dasuke kashe aure kuma wanda sai bayan anyi aure ake haduwa dasu.

Bari muyi bayanin kadan daga cikin matsaloli dasuke kashe aure a al’ummar hausa/Fulani

1.      Karya

Abu na farko dayake fara kawo matsala a acikin aure shine karya, zaka iya ganin Kaman cewa wanan ai bawani babban abu bane amma tabbas karya dazaka yita yiwa yarinya a waje kafin aure bayan tashigo taga labarin yasha bam-bam yanada matukar tasiri wajen Haifa muku matsala a cikin aure. Samari idan zasuje hira ko zance zai tabbatar ya fita fes-fes, zai tabbatar yatafi da kudi dayawa wanda zai bata alhali karfinsa bai kai yabada wanan kudi ba, watakila zai aro mota yatafi mata dashi.

Yanzu misali ace ma’aikaci ne mutum yanada albashin dubu hamsin (50) amma zai iya daukan dubu ashirin yabawa budurwa, sannan zai aro mota yaje wajenta, bata taba neman wani abu a wajensa tarasa ba duk tsadarsa. Sai azo ayi aure taga motar nan ba tasa bace kudinda yake bata yanzu bazai iya bata ba sabida yanada iyali yanzu, idan tanemi wani abu mai tsada ko kuid masu dan yawa  sai yace sai ya karbi adashi, tayaya baza’a fara samun matsala ba kanuna mata zaka iya kuma kazo ka kasa.

Abinda yafi shine kada kadinga yimata karya, idan aro mota kayi kafada mata wannan motar ba taka bace, idan ta nemi kudi masu yawa wanda bazaka iya bataba karka takura kanka sai ka samo kafada mata wallahi bakada shi zaka duba dai, kada kanuna mata kai mai kudi ne komai takeso zaka iya bata. To zaku gina soyayyarku akan gaskiya da gaskiya koda bayan kunyi aure tace kamata wani abu baka iya bata ba zata fahimci hakan.

2.      Kazanta/Rashin kula da gida

Wanan baya shafi mata bane kawai har maza ma, idan zaaje zance saurayi da budurwa kowa sai ya kure adaka, zai tabbatar kayansa masu kyau ne, yafesa turare sanan ya fito. Aure kuma zama za’ayi wanda zaku kwana tare ku tashi tare, bazai yiwu ace kowa yana cikinn kwalliya ba koda yaushe, amma yakamata kudinga kasancewa cikin tsafta koda yaushe kada kibari mijinki yaga kazantarki, kada kabari matarka taga kazantar ka. Ganin kazantar juna shine yakesa kuji kun ishi juna tin kafin ayi nisa sai azo afara zaman a hakuri har kowa yafara fito da abinda ke cikin ransa sai kuma kaga anata samun matsaloli karshe aure ya mutu arasa meye dalili tin farko ashe kazanta ce.

3.      Dangi da Yan’uwa

Yan’uwa da dangi suna daga cikin manyan abubuwa dasuke kashe aure a arewa, wani matsalar daga yan’uwan miji wani matsalan daga yan uwan mata. Wasu yan’uwan miji daga sunzo matar bata musu abunda sukeso ba shikenan zasu hau zaginta da sukanta, idan akayi rashin sa’a manya ma suka shigo shikenan saikaga ansa miji ya saki matarsa. Tsakaninsu basuda wata matsala amma sabida rigimarsu da yan’uwan mijin aure sai yamutu. Akwai wani bawan Allah da akasa ya saki matarsa kawai dan yan’uwan matar sun wulakanta yan uwan mijin, kawai suka sashi dole ya saki matarsa.

Yakamata aji tsoron Allah adaina  raba aure, musamman idan ba wani dalili ne mai karfi ba. Miji ko Mata kada ku bari ashiga tsakaninku kowani matsala zaku iya sasanta kanku basai wani ya shigo ba.